A Writer’s Identity

March 09, 2016 | 4 min read

This is a guest post by Rebecca A. Demarest. Rebecca is an award-winning book designer, author, and technical illustrator living in Seattle, WA with her bacon-sharing husband and a temperamental cat named Cat. Her novel,Less Than Charming, is available for pre-order through March 15th on Indiegogo, and will be launching from Parkhurst Brothers Publishing, Inc. on May 1st 2016. For more information on her work, please visit her website.

Several years ago, as we were getting ready for bed, my (now ex-) boyfriend turned to me with: “You know, since you keep putting off working on your novel, I’m going to have to start introducing you as a publisher instead of a writer.”

Instinctively, I corrected him. “Illustrator, not publisher.” That’s what I did all day—I drew diagrams for computer programs at a tech publisher. Even though I automatically corrected his title gaffe, it cut me to the quick that he no longer considered me a writer. But I knew he was right; that part of my identity seemed to have started slipping away sometime after obtaining my MFA. I had immersed myself in several rounds of editing on my novel née thesis and after all the work I had done editing and revising and rewriting, I finally sent out the query letters, but the response I was hoping for never came.

It was a good experience for me as several agents gave me useful feedback instead of form rejections, but it was also depressing, because they all pointed out a major flaw that none of my previous readers had even touched on. Apparently, though they all adored the setting and the story, they just could not connect with my main character as he was presented to them at the beginning of the manuscript and I had no idea how to go about fixing that fact. 

Under the pretext of trying to figure out how to fix my novel, I stopped writing. I’m a very methodical writer and I spend a lot of time planning before I begin, so it seemed logical to me to take a step back to analyze what I had and what was missing. I shelved the novel and moved forward with the rest of my life while I contemplated the changes.

At first it was just the novel itself that went untouched. Then it was my blog. I had started the blog for two reasons: to force myself into creating new fiction once a week, and to praise or rant about books that I had been reading so my friends didn’t have to hear me talk about them over and over. But then life and my health got in the way and I was running around trying to get everything done and diagnosed before work, after work, during work and my self-motivated, deadline-free writing took the hit. I stopped writing anything.

So, after an evening of hanging out with his friends, he said to me, “You know, if you keep putting off working on your novel, I’m going to have to start introducing you as a publisher instead of a writer.”

It hurt because he was questioning my identity, but even more so because I was afraid he was right. I knew I needed to start the next round of revisions on the novel. I knew I needed to create some fresh fiction and get back into the habit of writing every day. I knew all of this had to happen if I was going to progress and succeed, but never in a thousand years had I imagined myself as anything but a writer. Even when I wasn’t actively writing, I still considered myself a writer, not an illustrator.

I had been a writer when I was five and wrote my first story: “How a Butterfly got its Colors.” I ceased being a writer for exactly four months in college when I wanted to be a psychologist because I found it fascinating and thought I could make a decent living. Then a creative writing course I took cured me of my desire to make money and revived my craving to write. Maybe someday I’ll go back to psychology and look into a fascinating field called Narrative Therapies, but, for today, all I truly want to do is put words on the page and bring wonder and emotion to readers.

This then, I decided, is what it meant to be a successful writer: to put words on the page. It does not mean you put 500 words into your novel every day, no excuses, no breaks. No, it means that when the story grabs you and demands your attention, you listen, and you give it an outlet. Sometimes I go a couple months without creating new fiction, but in the meantime I am working on promotional materials, querying materials, submission applications, graphic designs for my stories, or looking for new readers. There is more to being a writer than your daily word count, or even your monthly word count. Some (very few) people are blessed to be able to be full time writers, but they are rare. Most of us must be content with fitting in a few hours here or there over a coffee while we wait for a meeting with the boss at our day-jobs, or late at night during NaNoWriMo when we feel like we’re connected to the whole world writing together.

And it can pay off. All of those stolen moments and pages, all those times where I put down the computer and despaired of being able to drag new words out of my skull, working around day-jobs and freelancing and health concerns, I can stand in front of you today and say “I am a writer,” and believe it to my core. Because I chose to reject his definition of being a writer and have embraced my own, I have brought two books to the market, I have had several short stories in journals and anthologies, including one that was featured on NPR, and I have a novel coming out with a traditional publisher this summer, all because I didn’t let someone else define me. I chose to believe I was a writer no matter what else was happening in my life, and that made all of it possible.

Recommended articles

More recommended articles for you

April 11, 2025 5 min read

Freewriter Britt Gondolfi has an important message: people need to put down their phones and LOOK UP. The medium she chose to get this message across? Pigeons and poop jokes.

Find out how Britt and her BFF (who happens to be her illustrator) took a silly song and turned it into a book deal.

April 11, 2025 2 min read

Astrohaus, the team behind Freewrite, is an American company. Like many American companies, and virtually all consumer electronic brands, our cost base is global. We work with contractors in Europe, in South America, and in Asia. We purchase components from a global supply chain and assemble our product in China, but make no mistake, we are an American company. The majority of our costs, including goods, services, and payroll, are from the United States. Most of our team lives in the Midwest. I founded this company in Detroit, Michigan, and am still here. I am proud to have built an American company that supports 10+ Americans and their families.

But now we are caught in a trade war that threatens our very existence. A war that was building up over time but has crescendoed to a point that no business owner could have prepared for. As I write this today, we have to pay an additional 145% of the cost of any product made in China as a tax to the U.S. Government.Yesterday it was 104%, up from 54%. In March it was 20% and in February it was 10%. Tomorrow?

Astrohaus is an importer because there is no consumer electronics industry in the U.S. China has emerged over the decades as the world's factory. At first, as a low-cost solution, but in 2025, they are undeniably the best in the world.

Now we are in a pickle because we have established relationships with our contract manufacturing partners that go back to when we started in 2014. Yes, some of the folks we work with today have been with us since the very beginning. They took a chance on us and helped us get off the ground. I have personally spent months on the ground in Hong Kong and China working closely with these folks, whom I now call friends.

Everyone, including our contract manufacturing partners, is helping us explore our options, but the truth is that it is incredibly difficult to move factories. It takes careful planning, huge expense, and much more time than we have.

Unfortunately, we can’t wait to let the trade war resolve itself, nor do we have the advantage big companies like Apple have with a diversified supply base in various countries. We must work with our existing supply base in China, and that means adjusting prices to cover some of our new costs. That's assuming a trade deal gets done, because 100%+ tariffs are simply untenable long term.

As one last hurrah, today through Sunday we will be keeping prices as they have been. Get them while they last.

On Monday, April 14, we will be raising prices. Not because we want to, but because we have to.Thank you for standing by us over the years. We aren’t going anywhere.

Write on,

Adam

Freewrite Founder & CEO

April 10, 2025 4 min read

Bryan Young writes for many magazines and online publications. As you get more entrenched within the industry and develop relationships with editors, the process can vary widely. But at the start of cultivating those relationships, it’s usually very much the same. Here's his walk-through of the process.